This was published on November 9, 2006
Life has definetally been a huge roller coaster ride the last few weeks. It has been a while since I've written and I need to. It is very theraputic for me to get my thoughts out. This is probably going to be a bit of a long one so sit and chill for a bit.
To start with I met a really cool girl. I don't know were things will go. Nothing serious yet. We've just gone on a few dates and talk on the phone a couple times during the week. We met at a wedding a couple months ago. I am seriously enjoying talking to her and hanging out with her. The crazy thing is that I'm not in a rush to see it go anywhere. I just want to enjoy the beginning part of hanging out and getting to know each other without it being clearly defined as to what we are. It actually feels good to be cautious.
Then there was Cedor's wedding. That was an absolute blast. It was so good to see my brothers and spend time with them. It is good to see Cedor so happy. The other good thing is that while I was down there, this was the first time I've ever come home from visiting the New Orleans area that I have not wanted to move down there. I honestly think God is trying to remove that desire from my heart. I feel like I finally really and truly gave him that desire and He is really cleansing me of it. I loved my time there and I can't wait to go back and visit, but I don't think moving down there is in God's plan for me. It is good to finally start to realize this.
I came home from Cedor's wedding and was a little depressed for a couple days. I normally get that way every time I come home from New Orleans. It was a different kind of depression though. I didn't necissarily want to be down there I just miss being around all those guys. As I told Guy while I was down there I really loved Steubenville but in a lot of ways I hate it also because it seems like there is a part of me that will never quite be able to stop missing it or let go in other aspects. I don't miss the place but I miss the experiences and the people. Some days more than others.
Then it was time for Kyle's wedding. What an amazing trip. It was so good to see my Rockford crew. We had a good conversation, good beer, good times! Kyle's new wife Erin, is an awesome girl and I'm very happy for them. It was also good to spend time with Kip and of course Rosko and Kelly. There were a lot of people at that wedding I hadn't seen in years!
Then Sunday morning while I was in Cincinnati it happened. I was on such a big emotional high. To amazing weekends in a row and new possibilities developing in Wichita. But Sunday I came crashing down. When I woke up I had a voice mail from one of the other Teachers I teach with. Three of my students had been in a plane crash. One of them and his Father died. Miraculously the other two had survived. I was in complete shock. I couldn't react. All I could do was have Kip take me to mass and drop me off at the airport. I go to the airport 3 hours earlier than I need to, but I needed time to think. I spent the next few hours on the phone asking people to pray and talking to students who were emotionally distraught. It was a hard day that has lead into an even tougher week.
Tomorrow is the funeral. It quite has not hit me yet. I've been too busy trying to be strong for my students and those around me. I've been trying my best to keep busy. Somehow I think It is all going to hit during the funeral. It is tough that something so tragic has happened in our community. These kids should not have to deal with this at such a young age. However, I am confident that God's grace will prevail. I know something good will come out of this; in some way. I pray for my students. I pray for the repose of Ryan and Mark's souls. I pray for Ryan B. and John Rice that they would get through this difficult time of healing from the accident. I pray for Ryan's mom who was left without a son and husband on Sunday. Please join me in prayer for all these things. So as you can see it has been a crazy last few weeks. God is working some amazing ways despite the sorrow. I pray that I can stay strong and persevere. Thy will be done Lord, thy will be done!