Tuesday, October 28, 2008

And God Laughed...

This was published June 11, 2008

My summer is in full swing. It has been incredible but far from what I expected so far. A few months back I wrote a blog entitled "If you want to make God laugh...tell Him your plans". Well laugh God did.
First off my summer officially begun with a trip to visit the Doherer's in Utah. It was an amazing weekend. Great food, good times with old friends, and some much needed relaxation.
Then began the week that has changed the entire course of my summer and quite possibly my year and even possibly my entire life. Totus Tuus training started on May 23rd. It was an amazing week. The teachers we hired this year are solid and doing an incredible job so far. The week, although a lot of work for me, also ended up being a much needed retreat. I was instantly imersed in prayer and the Sacraments. Also it was the last week of my preparation for Total Consecration to Jesus through Mary by Lewis DeMontfort. Let's just say finishing the consecration, daily mass, daily holy hours, daily Rosary and Chaplet, and daily Liturgy of the hours, combined with an openness from me that I have never experienced made for the perfect conditions for God to come into my life and rock it to the very core.
Three months ago I was planning ..ing my degree and moving back to Wichita in a year to teach at Carroll again and return to my home away from home. However, those were MY plans. Sure enough God has laughed and now things are heading in a different direction.
In the last few months I've been feeling the nudge to discern the Priesthood more seriously. Like most good Catholic males, I decided to ignore it and run away as fast as possible. Well then I made the mistake of really praying, which is the last thing you should do when you are trying to run from a vocation. I felt Christ telling me that I need to surrender and trust in Him completely. That I need to discern fairly and properly. I felt Him saying that if the Priesthood was my vocation He would reveal it to me through proper discernment, and if I had a vocation different from that, He would not let me have it, until I discerned Priesthood properly.
Well what that means is I have started making the steps to apply for seminary for the diocese of Wichita. Last Sunday I sent Fr. Pat York a text message asking him to call me ASAP. Well Monday he returned my call and I told him I felt I needed to discern the Priesthood properly. He responded with telling me he wanted to get the ball rolling and get me into seminary this fall. This was not the answer I was expecting. I thought for sure he would tell me to wait a year and finish my degree. Freaked out I called Fr. Jarrod and filled him in on everything. He proceeded to tell me to calm down and just go through the process and discern. By applying and going through the process I was not committing to Seminary I was simply continuing to stay open to that possibility. After I got off the phone with Fr. Jarrod, I called Fr. Matt McGuiness and left him a message. A couple hours later Fr. Matt called me back and asked me what I was doing the following Monday. I told him I knew I would have to get to Wichita eventually to meet with someone but that I didn't know how soon that could be. He responded by saying he would be in Denver that Monday. I said, "Well...then I guess I'm free". We met this past Monday for two hours.
So the ball is rolling. My paperwork is filled out. I have both a Physical and Psychological tests scheduled for the week after next and am continually going before the Blessed Sacrament asking for guidance. I don't know if I will enter seminary in the fall, or in a year, or even go through this whole process and realize I'm not supposed to enter. All of this is in God's hands. Its scary but also so incredibly exciting. My life could drastically change soon but I'm feeling a peace in simply allowing God to lead right now.
And God laughed...and I'm laughing right along with Him. I ask you all for your prayers over the next few weeks and months. God' will be done!

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